walking the green mile

It is always difficult to walk the green mile. Today is our implementation and we are just waiting for the clients to say "Looks good". The wait seems too long and hard.
I wish there was a time machine that would just transport us into Tuesday and everything looks fine and dandy. Then life moves on.

This feeling of walking the last mile was almost forgotten. The last time I was so nervous was during my II PUC physics exam. I remember I had not slept the previous night!

Till the last week we were all cool and comforatble. But suddenly this implementation seems too hard and slow. Like the vodka, it hits at the last moment. Nonetheless, everyone enjoys it :-). We have been waiting for this moment for a long time. Not for the implementation to happen but for the implementation to get over. Just to take a breather. About the other avinash (my PL), this project is the biggest thing he has done, and I should tell you, happen what may with the client check out, we know that he has been nothing less than fantastic. We call him the "karta dharta" of our project. Rest of us did what we were asked to do.
That brings me to my next quandary, if I only did what I was asked to do, then how proud should I feel about the project? I am sure everyone would get an appreciation mail for all the hard work in the project. But at the end of the day we all know who deserves it. You know what I mean.
I think the client is back and seems happy, I can hear the laughter!!
Signing off!!

That Fateful Thursday...

As written by my cousin.

15th Sept , 2005.

Yes true, we had heard rumors abt it.. every1 had met atleast 1 guy / gal who had told them the horror stories abt those bad old days..
Today seemed like a routine day.. the same installation problems.. The same nervous chatter, the same issues ..Software life was so predictable.. or so we thought.

Lunch time .. I can see that there is a nervous excitement all around.. something big is going to happen.. but nobody exactly knows what. We know that our client is not doing so well.. there are speculations of a "layoff" ..

& sure enough .. 1 by 1 messages started pouring in that some of our team mates had got mails..
" Please lock your machines & assemble at the terrace at 2.30 Pm. This message is intended just for you. Please do not share it with anyone. We have an important message to share with you. " .......
100 employees were laid off today.. I was not among them.. most were not so lucky.. (or unlucky?) ..

The 1s spared didn't know how to react? you tell me how should one react? do u feel happy bcos u have been spared? .. or do u feel scared that it could be you tomorrow? .. or do u feel sad for the employees who u will not be seeing from tomorrow.. All access cards stopped working , all emails blocked.. It was that Black thursday .. My first experience with a layoff..

There were question marks all around.. some in tears .. some saying their good byes.. some furious at the injustice.. many employess laid off had joined just 2 months back..

Life had been so secure.. I felt I could achieve anything.. I knew i had talent.. So many plans.. But in the end ... does it really make sense?

There are empty cubicles all around.. no more jokes to be shared across cubicles.. no more lunch mates.. ....

There is another release to complete, another deadline to meet. .. Life goes on............... . . . . . . .