Do not drink and drive.

Disclaimer: Do not drink and drive.

Scott Adam's recent blog gives interesting observations about how to avoid speeding tickets in the US. This prompted me to put forth something interesting. Something that would possibly not be possible in the US.

Funda 1: Never go out to a pub by your own vehicle (of course, late in the night) at the fag end of the month. That is the time when the cops have to meet their targets. Cops take their targets seriously and more often than not you are a victim to their infrequent seriousness.

Funda 2: If you do not read my Funda 1, always follow a bike or a car. Never lead the way. More often than not, you will not spot the police. They ambush you. 9 out of 10 times it is better that the drunk person driving in front of you gets caught than you. Trust me, there are always stupid people who would lead the way.

Funda 3 : (This is Ganapathy Naik's plan) If you do not read my funda 1 and do not carefully read Funda 2 and get caught by the police, DO NOT PANIC. Get out of the car. Lock it. Take an auto back home. (It seems) The police do not send you a court notice. (It seems) They simply let you go. I want somebody to try this. Feel free to post a comment if you have.

More later.

Tagged.

Just felt like getting myself tagged...

2. What does your phone look like? List your reasons to buy it?
Nokia (basic model). I did not buy it. I fliked my mom's.

3. What is on the walls of your bedroom?
Absurd question!

4. What is your current desktop picture?
Windows default picture. I think the photographs on the desktops are for others to notice your desktop. I dont prefer others looking at my desktop. I prefer to keep photographs in "my pictures" folder.

5. Do you believe in gay marriage?
believe?? They happen. I accept.

6. What do you want more than anything right now?
A mail from Melbourne school of Business.

7 . What time were you born?
At 4am. Mother says that I woke her up from deep sleep when I came into the world.

8. Are your parents still together?
Absurd question. I think this tag was started by a westerner. (yes)

10. What is your favorite perfume / cologne?
Nothing particular. I am not too appreciative of fashion industry. It is a whole lot of crap.

11. What kind of hair/eye color do you like in the opposite sex?
I can see only "sex" in this question. Could you please repeat the question?

12. What are you listening to? Why?
My neighbor talking on the phone. Why?? Because he cant keep his voice down.

13. Do you get scared of the dark?
I am scared of cockroaches. They come out in the dark. I am scared of dark.

14. Do you like painkillers?
No. I think it is for the weak. But I become weak one in a while. It is embarrassing.

15. Are you too shy to ask someone out?
No. Buy me a RC large and I can do anything.

16. If you could eat anything right now, what would it be?
paani puri.

18. List one habit you have that has the potential to annoy people?
My idea about life and my flawed principles.

* I have not answered a few questions for which I had to scratch my head.
**Interested in getting tagged? Pick the tag from pratish. He has the complete list of questions...

Attack of the autos.

Everyone I know has had at least a couple of bad incidents with the auto drivers in Bangalore. But as soon as we meet a good natured, 'ready for your service' kind of an auto driver we tend to forget our brushes with the unfortunate events. Read Dhi's blog. I have done that a lot of times. I give the auto community the benefit of me having met a sensible and understanding auto driver. But a couple of weeks back the auto drivers lost all the (little) respect I had for them.

I was at brigade road at 8pm on a Wednesday and was looking to get an auto back home. I made sure I completed all my work well within time so that the auto guy could not demand one-and-a-half. But time does not seem to be factoring into their logic for claiming one-and-a-half. I think there is no logic behind it. When I say Vijayanagar - Chandra layout, these are the answers I got -

"Double agutte" [I will charge double meter]
"Do sau pachaas lagega " [It will cost you Rs. 250] (Here I could not stop laughing.)
"Meter mele 40 kodi" [Give me 40 above the meter] (Meter mele 10 and 20 was at least heard of, but meter mele 40... strange)
"Corporation tanaka bidtini, 40rs agutte" [I can drop you till corporation. I will charge Rs. 40] (And that amounts to double meter).

I was not ready to pay even Rs.10 extra. So I told one auto guy that I am going to the police. The word police does not seem to scare them anymore. He gave me a 'police eh? They are capable of nothing' kind of a smile. Nonetheless, I went up to the police and asked him to get me an auto to Vijayanagar and that I was not ready to pay a rupee extra. The police said -

"You slap the guy who asks you one-and-a-half, we shall take on from there". I told the police that I did not want to get into a fight with the auto driver, so it would be nice if he could get me another decent auto driver to drop me home.

To my shock, the police guy said -

"Please walk up to the end of the road till Vellara junction. From there take a bus to majestic and then take another bus to Vijayanagar. We cannot command to the auto drivers. They do not listen to us anymore. And it is embarrassing when they reply back"

What could I do?

In that time another traffic police standing there went up to the auto stand and got me an auto. But he had told him that I would pay 10rs extra.

At the end of the day I had lost my battle against an auto driver union. Now I ride the bus as much as possible.